Online Dating 101 - Online Dating Basics
|
Online Dating 101by Kevin Koger
Feeling like there's something that's just not quite there yet in how you're going about this whole online dating thing? Don't feel bad, chances are you're one of the many people who're still pretty new to this gig. Heck, internet dating has only been around for about eight years, so obviously no one out there can claim to have all the answers.
But hey, seeing that we've been perfecting the art of matching people up online all eight of those years, we'd like to share a little of what we've learned about how to make the best of your online experience. Who knows, one of these pointers might be just what you've been missing in perfecting your own online dating adventures.
Therefore, without further ramblings, here are the:
TOP 10 TIPS FOR SUCCESSFUL ONLINE DATING
SAY CHEESE!Look your best and submit a great photo of yourself for your profile photo. A good picture really is worth a thousand words, and research shows that you are nearly 10 times more likely to be noticed if you post a photo to your profile.
And, the same stats hold true when you contact someone you've noticed on the site. If you don't have a photo, don't be surprised if the responses aren't too quick in coming back.
Now, don't get mad a start making accusations about all the shallow people out there. While it may be true that some people place too much emphasis on physical appearances, the bottom line is it does make a difference when two people are meeting and making initial evaluations of their interest in each other. And, it's also a trust thing. It is always going to be much easier to interact with a face than with a blank box.
FRESH IS GOODChange your profile picture and greeting occasionally, add photos to your photo album, and login regularly-this will not only get you noticed, but it will help others get a more varied and up-to-date idea of what constitutes the real you.
When something interesting happens in your life, tell us about it in your profile greeting. This is a great way to let your online friends in on what it might be like to actually spend time with you. That's the main goal of online dating isn't it, to find people you'd finally like to meet and spend time with face-to-face? Anyways, it's always more fun to hear about a crazy experience you've just had than to read the same old descriptions of you and your cat that have been on your profile for months now.
As for photo albums, this is the icing on the cake. Not only do these photos round out and confirm the physical picture your friends are forming of you, but they also go a long way in helping others really see what makes you "you." The head and shoulders shot of you in your profile photo is nice and all, but when they see you hanging 10, running with your Chihuahua, or shoving a big fat piece of cheesecake in your mouth ? now they're getting to know you.
I HAVE CONFIDENCE IN MEHave fun describing yourself without making excuses about why you're on the site or who convinced you to finally go online. Tell us what makes you unique.
Believe it or not, being an online dater no longer places you on the fringes of society or even in the minority. Online dating has grown up and moved into the mainstream, and so you can now happily assume that the face-saving qualifiers of past times online are now obsolete. And, more importantly, just realize that they don't help your cause when meeting others online.
One more thing ? try to be original. Yes, I'm sure you really do like the outdoors and want to meet someone who looks good in a tux and in jeans, but so does everyone else! Tell us some things about yourself that wouldn't necessarily come out in an elevator conversation with your tax accountant. For example, what are you passionate about? What would you do if no longer had to work for a living? What's your favorite flavor of gelato? Do you secretly wish everyday was sampling day at the grocery store? ? now it' getting interesting!
HONESTY IS THE BEST POLICYDon't be fooled thinking telling fibs will impress that special someone enough to get relationship started... it will turn them off! Be your best self.
When you really stop and think about it, what do you think your new friend's reaction is going to be if when you meet for the first time it's obvious you're not the person they thought they were going to be meeting? "Oh .. hi. I see that you've been dishonest with me from the get-go here, but hey, I'm still thinking we've got a great shot at having an open, trusting relationship for the long-term" Obviously not.
They're going to be hurt, and disappointed. And, your relationship is unlikely to get past the wave goodbye as your friend gets back in their car to go home.
IT'S NICE TO BE NICEOkay, so you get a little grouchy once in a while-don't we all? However, people like nice people. Please be considerate and polite ? it will make this whole online thing so much more enjoyable for all of us!
There's an interesting social phenomenon researchers have discovered in online interactions. They've found people often change their standards of politeness and diplomacy when a conversation is happening online, versus face-to-face.
Don't believe it? You might be surprised if you were to go back and look at some of the things you've said. Look at some messages you've sent, and then consider saying the exact same words in a face-to-face or a telephone conversation. Sound a little rough? Don't feel too bad, it happens to the best of us, just try to keep this in mind the next time you're typing out an email or instant message.
One more thing-please don't ignore people. A quick "thanks, but no thanks" note is so much better than no reply at all. In fact, next time you're replying to a message on the site, check out the new "Thanks but No Thanks" template. It's a quick way to nicely let someone know you're not interested in corresponding.
YOU CAN PICK YOUR FRIENDS ?Invite your friends along! Create Activity Groups, go on group dates, try Express Dating, enjoy travel events, and just enjoy the net together. After all, instant messaging alone isn't enough to build solid relationships.
Group dating and group events simply make a lot of sense for online dating. Not only does it make those first dates less stressful, it often makes them more fun, and it definitely makes first meetings a much safer proposition.
Have you ever tried Activity Groups? They're a great way to meet people with common interests in a safe, fun group setting. You can join a group that's already been created, or you can create your own and invite all your friends to join ? and their friends ? and their friends ? you get the point.
BREAK OUTA THAT SHELLDon't be afraid to make the first contact. Online dating makes it easy for all you shy ones out there to break the ice, because you get to do all the initial getting to know each other from the comfort and safety of your own computer.
To start, just send a Flirt or a quick email message saying Hi-and do it often! You might be surprised how many of our great members suffer from lack of attention from their online peers. Not only might you find someone with whom you're very interested in maintaining contact, but you'll probably be making someone's day.
EXPAND YOUR HORIZONSIf your first internet efforts haven't turned up "the perfect one," don't despair. Hundreds of new people sign up every day on the site, so just come back to see Who's New. You may also want to consider expanding your searches-don't be too intent on sticking to your itemized checklist for eternal mates.
You might also want to try some different searches from time to time. Because there are about a million different things you might find attractive in another person, it's nice to mix up the criteria you're searching on once in a while. For example, you can search by their Occupation, any Keyword or combination of keywords you can think of, and many others.
UH OH ? THIS MIGHT ACTUALLY BE FUN!Don't be afraid to have some fun along your path to relationship happiness! Enjoy getting to know people and understand that many happy relationships and even marriages start with a good ol' friendship. And, don't rush it!
You've heard animals can sense fear? Well, we humans can be pretty perceptive as well (except for that one guy who just can't take a hint). So, don't think others can't sense when you're frustrated, dejected, conceited, holier than thou, fed up, etc. etc. Put a smile on, and enjoy the ride, because even if the first few people you meet aren't Mr./Mrs. Right, it doesn't mean you can't have some fun in good conversations with them.
You may also need to be a little bit patient as you head off into the brave new world of online dating. Not all marriages are "love at first site," and even if yours is, it may take a lot of looking before you "site" that special someone. And so, once again ? enjoy the ride!
USE YOUR NOODLEYa know, that gray matter between your ears? That's your noodle. Use it! Be smart, be cautious, and follow our safety guidelines, your instincts, and the spirit in all your dating activity.
Done right, online dating is a lot of fun, and it's a great way to meet some wonderful people ? just ask the thousand-plus people we've had submit success stories to us in the past few years! So, enjoy it, and follow these ten tips, and hopefully we'll be getting a success story from you sometime soon.
Visit www.metromingle.com today to meet local singles in your area in a clean and wholesome environment.
|
|
|
Win Her Heart With Romantic Gift Ideas
Does your significant other cry at goofy commercials? Does she beg you to take her to every romantic comedy that comes out in the theatres? Can you absolutely count on the fact that she will always remember every date that has even the slightest significance in your relationship?Uh-oh. Sounds like you are in serious need of some romantic gift ideas.Don't panic! We've listed some of the best ones around below.TattoosQuick! What's the best way to show her that you'll be around forever? By putting her name in a tattoo on your body, of course. She will quiver with delight as you show her where you put her name-forever. Not quite feeling confident enough t...(related: Dating Tip)
Funnel Your Way To Love
I call it "The Funnel." And it's the best way to view your online dating experience. A numbers game it is, and your job is to funnel your way through prospects until you find what you're looking for.Stage 1 of the Funnel: On most dating sites, ther...(related: Dating Tip)
How To Find True Love Quickly And Easily
How often do you find yourself wishing you could find truelove?Unfortunately, you're not alone. With millions of singles outthere, why is it so hard fo...(related: Dating Tip)
Self-esteem
It begins with you, and your attitude. There are a lot of misconceptions about what type of guys women date. Most guys start thinking, oh they only date the rich guys with thick wallets, or those supermodel guys who look super hot. First off, if you're looking to find a date, you need to stop comparing yourself to other guys. This show isn't about those guys with Porsches and Ferrari's, it's about you.Believing that you can get a date will help you become more confident. If everyday, you think of yourself as a...(related: Dating Tip)
True Love And Chemistry: Exploring Myth And Reality
When you think about the qualities found in a true "soul mate" relationship, what one word comes up most often on the top of your list?Is it CHEMISTRY? Probably.Just the mention of this term conjures up powerful feelings and images for anyone who has ever been in or seeking a love relationship. It is often described as a feeling that leaves you breathless, excited and weak in the knees. Palms sweat, the heart races and the body tingles with nervous anticipation.It is believed by virtually everyone that true love cannot exist without chemistry. Therefore, the conclusion most would-be lovers come to is that if they experience these intense feelings towards someone, they have the basis for an ideal and lasting relationship.Right? Maybe not. For this definition...(related: Dating Tip)
From Pen Pal Romance To Online Dating
While dating in person usually starts with physical attraction, dating online or pen pal romance often starts with the echo of souls. When the appearance and thoughts are in harmony, we fall in love and have a happy ending. Your heart was pounding when you saw the smiles on her eyelashes. You could have a sleepless night after reading his emails. Whether you find your date online or in person, you could end up with a true love or a broken heart. Pen pal romance or online dating wouldn't change how men and women love, it changes the way how they fall in love.Many of us had their first pen pal when we're a little kid. We wrote to a kid we had never and will never met. The letters opened a new world f...(related: Dating Tip)
How To Carry Yourself With The Body Language Of An Alpha Male
Watch Brad Pitt, George Clooney, or any other man with high status and you'll notice that they simply move differently than the rest of us. They have an aura about them that they are hot stuff, and because of that, women swoon over them.You too can develop that aura, in order to increase your attractiveness to women and your dating success.Have you ever noticed the way your...(related: Dating Tip)
Christian Dating Service And Dating Services
A Christian dating service can help single Christians meet one another and find companionship that is based on Christian principles and foundations. A Christian dating service can help thousands of Christians meet, and sometimes marry, others who share their values and faith. The Internet is an incredible access point for those looking into dating services. Now, most dating services begin with online applications and postings, letting email be the beginning point of a contact. Not every Christian dating service has the same philosophy, and not all dating services truly have a m...(related: Dating Tip)
Are You Up For The Challenge
Back in 2004, I met a gentleman who was interested in getting to know me better. After a few discussions of finding out what I needed to know, I decided to participate. Early in this process, he told me that he is not a good "chit-chat" starter. He could engage in conversation but starting it and keeping it flowing were not his gifts. As time moved on, I found this to be true and it began to be a bother. The long moments of silence on the phone at times drove me batty. I don't know about you but I don't do long moments of silence well at all.One day, I decided to ask him how he felt about our communication. I mentioned to him my concern about the long moments of silence and he began to apologize. Well, I told him that I appreciated his apology but there was really no need for it. I asked the questi...(related: Dating Tip)
Bachelor Dream
Step aside Hugh Hefner. Elvis King is back in the building.Bachelors, remember the guy in high school who got all the girls. Maybe he was the home coming king or the football captain. He's Probably not getting the girls any more. I am sure he married the home coming queen and has four kids by now. And you should see the fat little wife he has. But not y...(related: Dating Tip)
A Date With A Stranger
Well, I have decided to move forward once again. I have had two relationships that I thought were it, believed I got all the signs, thought I had found my soulmate. Just to be slapped back into reality once again. I am so tired of the whole dating game. I am now 31 yrs old. I really miss having a family life. I have my son, but I am yearning for so much more. I guess my whole outlook on life was love. That was the most important thing to me. I have since decided that maybe I am putting way to much emphasis on finding the right one and not putting enough effort into meeting new people as friends and possibly potentials. I was just never a dating girl I guess.My friends say, 'there is no reason for yo...(related: Dating Tip)
Creating Your Online Dating Profile
Are you considering the possibility of using an Online Dating Site to find the Date or Love of your dreams? Yes? Well, did you know that the most important part of finding your special someone through online dating is your profile. As explained in my book "the Ultimate Online Dating Handbook" eve...(related: Dating Tip)
site-map - Copyright © 2006 | Contact Disclaimer/Webmaster | Links Resource | All Rights Reserved. | Dating Tip